我想我还是不够成熟
还达不到 你的要求
我真的没有想的太多
只是怀念 你走以後
离开 难道真的是解脱
难道 真的要事过境迁了以後才懂
倔强说不痛 假装什么伤都没有
倔强抬起头 决不让眼泪往下流
真的不难过 笑着和你挥挥手
如果有一天 我们有缘再见
你会不会想起 说过的永远

i know i have missed my boat, can i have another chance? you should know how much you mean to me.

i know im dumb to ask you for another chance. you hate me very much now right?

i never once hate you, those words were said out of anger.

im sorry ok.

the previous post, i cried while reading it in class. nice memories indeed.

can we create new memories?

hahahahas, how dumb, im asking for the impossible now.

i love you.

this blog started on the 9th of july. think today is the end of everything.

was through with everything. like finally. think it's better for the both of us.

we've been through a lot. thick and thin. memories are flooded in our minds. the first time we met is in school. the first movie we watched together, you actually watched it twice. den you confessed when i went to malaysia. was avoiding you every single time you came to school to find me. either asking je to block, or asking susan to spy. if you're coming, i'll walk out from the back gate or stay in class until you leave. ignored your every sms after which.

first time contacting after so long, was before my birthday last year. hoping that you wouldn't come over to my chalet coze i feel that it'll be so weird. but it turned out well. missed you after which. was kinda like flinging. held hand on a black friday. kissed you on the cheek under a void deck. our first kiss at the carpark. written it on the wall. you wrote my name on the floor. where i sat that day. wei jie tricked us and he saw something he shouldn't. everyday going for pool or mahjong after which. before school start, we tot things will be different and you felt insecure. but in the end it turned out right. i skipped school to find ou sometimes. you came over to my school to surprise me if i were to end late that day. talking on the phone with me, to trick me and i looked like a retard talking on the phone with you while washing my stuff inside the toilet and you came in panting. was so tired and feel like dying ater school and you were already there standing outside y class waiting for me. nomatter how much work i have, we would spend time together after school so that we'll see each other for a longer period of time. and i'll go home to rush my last last last minute work. i'll feel contented just seeing you. quit school after which. went to work. neglected you. and you were so frustrated. we quarreled. patched up fast. i quit my job, you were there for me to go through wadever things. and i'll grumble to you about work. but you'll be there for me and listen to me. sometimes joining in together to scold. you'll tell me about school. finding a job with me. you seems so free. started working at plc. you'll still be there.

dear, this will be the last time i call you by that name. never again. i still remember everything. still have memories. you'll still remember how to walk around sp i think. haha.

once again,

please live your life to the fullest. please take good care of yourself. please don be a bastard like me, not knowing how to handle my relationships properly. please do care more about your friends coze they are really good friends. please don smoke too much. please find someone that can take care of you better den me. please love like you do love me. please don do any wrong things. please live better den me. please don let your mummy worry about you again coze your mom really care for you. please get over me as soon as possible coze i'm not worth it. please... coze i really care for you and i love you. please hae a better life den me...

我知道你还是爱着我虽然分开的理由我们都以接受你知道我会有多难过所以即使到最后 还微笑着要我加油我知道你还放不下我才会在离开时闭着眼没有回头答应你 我会好好过不让 这些眼泪白流...

ok, people are saying this blog is dead and whatsoever.

the very last post for this almost dying blog but not yet dead.

yes, think most of you people have guessed, we have broken up. no more stunts and anything. its true. it was a mutual agreement between me and cheryl lee. we ended it very nicely. started nicely, and ended nicely. we think that this is a very good option for the both of us, cause some things are meant to be this way. hahahahahas. im like crapping here.

anyway, i want to thank you for all the memories you gave me throughout this 9 months plus, i've enjoyed every single moment with you. meeting you out almost everyday without fail, we're practically like glue, stuck with one another. from the very first chalet which is your birthday chalet, to the most recent chalet. it was like fun and memorable.dont even know how to cook 3 sticks of satay and otah, whereas i was like taking care of the whole section of satay. from watching one movie to 2 movies in one day, accompany you to register in SP, carrying your 2.5kg lappy from SP to JP to watch movie, then to your house. stargazing with you was the nicest event, we will challenge one another to see who will find the 3 stars that form one line first, slacking till late night and we just dont feel like going home, went to play pool everyday while waiting for your olevel results, our first prawning outing, with je during sunday morning, second prawning session with jh and kelly. our first monthsary outing, you wasnt late for the very first time, drew something for me, went to MS to catch 17 again, Zac Ecfron, then to Esplanade to have candy floss. our first photo taking session, went to marina barriage, took loads of pictures, though its for your assignment, but we have fun capturing fun and memorable moments. flyer ride, it was so sweeet, to look at the scenery with you, we were practically in our own world. our first working together experience, F1. our first kiss at the carpark near the bridge, the first time you hold my hands, 13 the black friday. our first sentosa tanning was with kelly and shuhua, stargazing at skypark, knock my head immediately after you asking me to becareful of the wall above my head, you laughed like mad. first soaking our leg together at skypark, our first time travelling to jookoon cause we didnt know how jookoon look like and we named it gui di fang. our first FOP together with your sister. our first cartoon movie, UP 3D was at amk hub. our first time cycling at pasir ris park during your relative's chalet, our first drinking session. our first fine for flicking cigg butt. our first time eating ajisen together at cck. our first time eating crab at one random food stall. our first time going to sentosa to take the 4D Magicx ride, so many of our first time, i just freaking miss them.

and i still strongly believe in our promises, you should know what are they. till then, i've never regret knowing you. and you know it. im not gg to give up just because of that, cause i strongly hope that a miracle will happen. im going to turn back time to last year, your birthday chalet that changed everything. i've waited for you for 2 years plus, and yeahh. im gg to do that now still. =D

i love you cheryl lee.

im so sorrry to break my promise made to you when we first get started. but im sorry, i'll have to make this r/s end here. i just don like the sight that your mummy and you getting so piss off when it comes to me. so i think i have to do something about, im sorry to leave you and i hope you will have a better one the next time eh? hope that you will be happy, and im sorry for causing you so much misery.

all the memories will be kept in me. thanks for being there with me when i needed you the most.

iloveyou for the last time.

• Customer A: Hey miss, why is this hamster so active and always chase other hamsters?
• Me: oh, it can be due to hormonal changes actually, so ya, it's natural. *smile ((: *
• Customer A: Oh... I see. How about this one?
• Hamster: *Climb up the wheel and jump down itself, falling onto the bedding and squeeking*
• Me: i think it's having suicidal thoughts *smile ((: *
• :
• stupid leh... as if i know what the hamster is doing =.=: